Friday, October 16, 2009

I'm the luckiest...

Ha, I reached 100 posts and wasn't even aware...besides being a nice outlet to record my thoughts and perception of events, these 102 posts have also served another purpose...

I had no idea whatsoever, but someone was becoming intrigued by me based on what I was writing here. She says that my sincerity and willingness to lay my emotions out was attractive to her, unbeknownst to me. We interacted via blog for months and then began communicating in other ways. Twitter and AIM can do great things for the communication between two people. We became fast friends. Good friends. We would genuinely look out for one another, encourage one another, listen to one another vent about big things and bullshit alike, give one another advice, console one another, just really provide moral support to one another. Soon enough, when I had a problem or something happened, she was the first person I wanted to discuss it with... 

I found myself with a crush on this girl. I knew she was different than most women her age (she's a bit younger in terms of chronological age) and even most women my age. I knew she was a kool girl with a good head on her shoulders. Extremely attractive. Very genuine in everything she said. Very sensible. Very in tune with my feelings. The more we communicated, the more I knew she was somethin' special...and even had everything I thought about her confirmed one weekend. We met and hung out...saw a movie, ate some awesome red velvet cupcakes, and spent a night bar-hopping. She was just as special in person. But I was still very much in a relationship and trying my damndest to be committed to that relationship...plus, I didn't think I had a chance with her anyhow. Thought to myself, "no way she'd be into me."

I was so wrong...

Lo and behold, my ass has a chance!

And on November 5, I'm flying to New York City to take my chance!

She's just special. Everything about her. We have the same values, the same priorities, we want the same things out of life and out of a relationship. She's gorgeous. She's sweet. I've met a million women, but this is the first time I can honestly say that I've had the pleasure of getting to know a lady. She's a true lady. She's classy, graceful, stylish, elegant, has standards for herself and how she carries herself, she knows how to act, she thinks before she speaks, and everything she says and does is with the highest degree of taste. After everything I've gone through, how I've been treated, and the coarse women I encounter around here, she is most definitely a breath of fresh air. I can't wait to see what we can turn into.

I'm not completely crazy though, I haven't lost touch with reality. I know that things are still very much in the beginning phases. It could go either way, anything could happen. And yes, I just got out of a relationship. I'm fine. I'm doing quite well with putting it behind me and moving forward. I just feel like I finally have a chance to truly have everything I've ever dreamed about having in a woman. We have a lot to offer one another, I can see us being a real nice couple. Things just feel so different with her, they just feel right. In the past, I've been scared as hell to see my feelings grow this fast. But I am perfectly at ease with this situation. And even though I don't truly believe that anybody qualifies as an expert when it comes to relationships, I have a few friends that have been in long-term, healthy, happy partnerships for years and I'll take their word that feeling completely comfortable is a surefire sign that it's right. God said Fear Not, but I believe He gave us good sense to feel a need to hesitate or be scared about things that aren't right for us. 

It's time for me to take it down for the night...

2 comments:

E. said...

Okay, first of all.I'm pissed that you're blowing off your weekend at pride in ATL to go to NYC! *exaggerated sigh*

Just kidding! Dude, I'm so happy for you!! Go for it. You deserve to be happy after everything you've been through lately.No disrespect to Shanee but you know I've always had my lil issues with her and how she treated you after your dad's passing.It was just selfish and rude and I know you would never have done that to her.I'm sorry she's hurting but like you said, it's waaaaaay too little too late! And don't let her make you feel guilty about not being able to move on.She's young,she'll be perfectly fine.That's textbook 'ex' behavior but hopefully she'll be unselfish enough to allow you to be happy.

Noone gets how you're feeling about this new girl(whomever could she be??**wink**) more than me. Doesn't it feel so incredibly amazing and unbelievable?? It takes your breath away for real.Forget about whether or not it's too soon and what'll happen in the future and all that..sometimes when it feels that good you just gotta jump in and go for it. I did and it worked out well for me.I wish you all those blessings as well.Have the best weekend ever!

Simone said...

Damn, congrats!

That's crazy, but amazing, and I hope it works out for you. If it does, be sure to throw some of that love mojo my way, kay?

Keep us posted and good luck.