A lot of things have taken place!
Baby Damien was born Monday mornin. Jackie was rushed into surgery for an emergency c-section at 6:03 and Damien was out at 6:17am. That was after 21 hours of labor. She just wouldn't dilate past 4cm. He came out with the cord around his neck and fluid in his lungs. He had a low apgar score because of the stress. He was in the NICU for about 4 hours, but he got it together quickly and is back with his parents where he belongs. I went to see him in there. He's too cute. I was disappointed that I had to leave and couldn't hold him, but I'm going back on Friday when they're home and things are more calm. I'll take good pictures then...I'd rather not post him with a tube going down his nose. He was kind of fussing and kicking around and as soon as my brother began speaking, he calmed down immediately. See, my brother has been reading to him since Jackie was about 3 months along. He would seriously make her sit and have like an hour of "story time" every night. Most nights she was exhausted from serving tables and just wanted to pass out, but he was so into her pregnancy that he would insist and she was so touched by him acting like that that she'd comply. It paid off. He's so familiar with his daddy's voice, it soothed him instantly. He's already a character too...when I started talking, he covered his ears. We cracked up.
My cousins from California are in town. I picked them up from the airport on Sunday. It was my cousin Nyla, her husband Isaac, and their baby Noa. They're fun, very high-energy. I feel bad for Nyla. She's bi and Isaac hates it. She won't cheat and she won't lie, which is great. But he will not allow her to have a chick on the side and he will not do threesomes. So she's just forever miserable and yearning for somethin more. We had a pretty open discussion about a few things...I guess now that we're both adults, she felt comfortable asking me about things in our teenage years that she didn't want to ask me about then. Like who I was messing around with. It's kind of funny, the person she thought that I was messing with in high school (we weren't) is actually the first girl I ever messed around with when I was 8. Her and Nyla have an ex in common. And to really make it all a good story, my mother and her father had an affair while my parents were divorced. My hometown is really just way too small. That's soap opera type stuff.
Shanee came home from Jamaica. She kind of came out to her mom, but didn't go all the way through with it. Her mom asked did she like girls and she said yeah, then her mom asked "well, what does that mean?" (What else could it mean? duh) and Shanee changed the subject. So, her mom went back and said "I hope you find a nice boyfriend soon." Ugh. Why do parents and families make the whole thing so unnecessarily difficult?? That boyfriend comment shoved her back in the closet a couple more feet. But she dresses like a boy and her family does not like that at all either. We already know it's gonna be an issue. But anyhow, she came home late last night and emotions have ran high ever since. We talked last night about her trip and about the baby and then it got sexual like it does at t and it got that way again this morning while I was tryna work. Then emotions were running high for another reason...our plan is for her to come stay out here for most of the summer. (Desiree, we comin to Chicago for a couple nights!) Anyhow, her mom said that she can't take off for an extended period until her room is done being remodeled. And I was irritated because she was playin around doing everything else instead of picking out her paint. But she had the paint picked out by night's end, so I calmed down.
I'm a lil bit ashamed of my reputation. I'd like to work to change it. I'm known as a player and a womanizer. Friend thought that I was a player the moment she met me. I know how to act while I'm in a relationship for the most part...I've done one playerish thing in the past 2 years while I was in an official relationship. But when I'm single, I'm really single. I date around. Talk to a handful of people. And somehow or another, I've either overstepped some lines and it's no longer "dating around" or maybe my view and outlook on the situation is totally wrong. Because a lot of people seem to hold this belief that I'm just a dog. For some reason, it's been coming out a lot lately. Just the comments people have been making. One of my friends didn't know what Twitter was and she asked me who I was texting one day and I was like "um, Twitter" and she said, "who's Twitter, one of your bitches??" I just looked at her. That same friend is dating a girl that lives in my apartment complex. She was like "I'd tell you where she lives so you could come chill and play the wii with us, but I don't trust you with her address." Shocked, I asked why. She said, "because you'll be fucking her next week!" I laughed, but it kind of stung. I didn't realize I gave off that vibe to the extent that somebody wouldn't trust me knowing where their girl lived. One of my coworkers asked me for some advice about her relationship. I gave it to her. There was another girl present while we were having the conversation. When I got up to walk away, the other girl told her "don't listen to Erika, she think just like a nigga and runs the same games." I cut my eyes at her and we laughed, but it made me think. People call people "boo" all the time and it means absolutely nothing, but I said it to a friend and our other friend was like "yeah, you can be Erika's boo, but she'll have about 10 more too." I told her to just shut her mouth. Shanee says it's the first thing she thinks about when I piss her off. My dealings with women is my biggest fault and my biggest character flaw in her eyes. I don't like that. I guess I just have to prove everybody wrong.
- ▼ May (9)